Monday, October 27, 2014

Damage

You broke me
You made me invincible and you broke me
You took away everything I loved and you hurt me
Not because you cared but cus you could and that burnt me
You took your time and you looked hard but couldnt see
That all you were really hurting was you
And maybe me

So let me wrap my arms around you and keep you safe
From the world that wants you and me to fail
I was tied up protecting you from the world
Tied in protecting you from things that hurt
How blind was I,when I couldnt see
The only thing hurting you was me
Only me

Now the phone rings
You've got one last song to sing
Just when I stop and start to do my own thing
But you arent done with me,you've more pain to bring
Hooks so deep the scars burn bright as you pull and I cling
You need someone to talk to,to cry to,youve got to take one last swing

So I take my place in the firing line,cus thats where you need me to be
Always me.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Door Number 1

Somehow it seemed a bit cooler in the dark.

It really doesn't make sense.Sure,light fixtures emit a certain amount of heat.But that's not going to drastically change the temperature of a room.

I guess it was all in my head,but right now I needed to believe it was cooler with the lights off. The fans in both the rooms were spinning at max speed,pouring buckets of hot air over me. Every single window was open,hoping for even the tiniest gust of coolness to sneak in.Even the tiny bathroom window was open,but that wasn't really for the heat.

Pune. Someone told me this place was a hill station with wonderful weather.

Someone lied.

My shirt had come off hours ago,pretty much everything else followed a few minutes later.

I paced around the apartment in my underwear.

Sounds filtered in through the open windows.College kids laughed in the distant night,dogs barked at nothing and a few hours rumbled every now and then.

Most of the apartment was lit by darkness,except for the dim glow of the open laptop and an empty Word document.The desk in living room was absolutely never used for writing.It was where I dumped my keys.It also resembled a landfill that catered exclusively to McDonalds.

Writing is a lot easier than it looks. Its hard to get started.You cant force it. You need that tiny fucking seed of an idea. Something,anything.Then you take that fucking seed,pour some fucking imagination in it,a coupla flowery fucking words,end it with an M.Night Fucking Shyamalan twist and good fucking night.And its that fucking easy.After you're done,you give it up to the publishers and critics,let them rape it in the fucking eye socket a coupla times. Hopefully you'll get paid and not end up a deadbeat.

I paced around a bit more,as more of the laughter creeped in.


Fucking kids.


I heard footsteps from outside. The lights in the hallway were still on,and I could see the shadow of someones feet at the door.I froze.I felt ridiculous,standing in my underwear,afraid that someone might see me through a solid fucking door.The person paused outside for a while.I considered reaching for my scattered clothes.

A whisper,as a sheet of paper slid out from underneath the door. I sighed in relief as I realized it was just a take out menu of some sort.I ignored the paper and returned to my pacing.

I guess it was about twenty seconds later that I noticed it.

The feet were still at the door.

I was puzzled.Not scared yet,just puzzled.I walked to the door,reached down and grabbed the paper and looked through the peephole at nothing.

Nothing at all.

I stumbled back.There were no more shadows.Whomever it was, must've walked away just before I looked.

Getting some clothes on and opening the door,that didn't sound like a good idea.Because I was scared now.


I was quite scared.


I looked down at the paper,an ordinary white A4 size sheet of paper.It had a smiley face sticker in the corner.And right in the middle all it said was



Hello.



More laughter drifted in,but more muffled.It seemed to be coming from farther away now.

I reached for a pen in the mess on the desk and bit off the cap.I kneeled at doorway,paper against the door,the nib an inch off the paper.I paused.What was I doing?



Who are you?



I dropped the pen,and placed the paper on the ground.My hand was shaking.I slipped it across.

Almost immediately it came back with the slightest whisper.

Thats when I noticed it.The noise.Or the lack of it.No dogs,no cars...no kids.Not even the sound of the fan.Only a muffled a silence and a low ringing that was getting louder.I was sweating profusely.It had gotten a lot hotter.I reached for the paper.Sweat stung my eyes.

Under the cold light of the dark, I read.



Turn around.You'll see.