Friday, February 3, 2012

The Unnatural

Unnatural bouts of fear.
Perceived movement on the other side of my bedroom window.
Randomly fluttering curtains.
Feeling observed.

Dead dog, in my living room.
Dead birds on the roof.
A vial of white pills.
Neither placebo nor cure.

A man in a white coat.
Ladies in green.
All eyes fixed on me.

White environment.
A room merely declared as solitary.
Loneliness yet I dont feel.

Bed, Mirror and the loo.
Morning, noon and night.
Dead by morning.
Unnatural hands, the harbinger of my doom.

Unnatural death.
Fractured hyoid.
Self strangulation they say.
Physicians devoid of physical perception,
declare dead yet another mysterious person.

But, hardly anybody asks for my side of the story.
I performed the unnatural.
But I wasnt me.


Depersonalization disorder (DPD) is a dissociative disorder in which the sufferer is affected by persistent or recurrent feelings of depersonalization and/or derealization. Diagnostic criteria include persistent or recurrent experiences of feeling detached from one's mental processes or body. The symptoms include a sense of automaton, going through the motions of life but not experiencing it, feeling as though one is in a movie, loss of conviction with one's identity, feeling as though one is in a dream, feeling a disconnection from one's body, out-of-body experience (a detachment from one's body), and difficulty relating oneself to reality and the environment.

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